Hand Me an Eraser, I’m Starting Over

This is my first post of the New Year, and my 30th since I began blogging the middle of August, 2011.

This blog has been my creative outlet during many changes these 4 months. I would like to thank all of you who follow The View Is Great. Your comments and personal messages mean a lot to me.  

Hard to believe we are already a week into 2012, huh? In ways it feels like it should be February already.

Anyway, I’m gearing up to do some fun writing this year and thought I’d throw a few hints out for what I’m thinking of writing about.

As I mentioned in an earlier post I plan on sharing my own battle with the blues. The deal is that I have to either wait until I’m in my dark place to be able to write this particular post, or I need to plan on the possibility of going to the dark place because I am writing about it. Neither will be easy, so I will just have to wait on the time to be right.

I’m thinking before it really is February, I will write about our interracial adoption for National Black History Month. (GEE, I better get on that!)

Humor is such a part of my personality, life and my upbringing that I must post about practical jokes. Consider yourself warned. This one could be rather lengthy, but guaranteed to bring you a laugh.

And since we’ll be traveling to visit Larry’s mother who will be moving from his childhood home soon, I really need to post about Mama Crew. She’s a funny lady and I think you will enjoy hearing about her. Those who know me have already heard some of her great “Mama Crewisms”.

And of course, I will dedicate a whole blog post to sex.

Just joking, but I’m sure that caught your attention now, didn’t it? I mentioned sex in one of my earliest posts. (Books – The Key to Knowledge, 8/28/11) No details, just the basic word, and I actually had someone tell me it was TMI (for those of you non texters and I know you are out there, TMI = Too Much Information.) Needless to say, I don’t have to worry about offending them anymore since they no longer follow my blog.

I hope you know that I would never want to offend, but I’m also pretty honest here.

So, speaking of honesty, how is everyone doing with resolutions?

All the things I thought I would improve on, I have already messed up. I wanted to have more patience, and during the first commute on Monday I was already fussing at the car in front of me. I haven’t had enough sleep or exercise this week, and the ‘healthy food only’ rule was broken by January 2nd. Not a single closet is any closer to being cleaned.

Here’s some great news about this first week of dreary January though… The past few days have been absolutely spring like and beautiful. The sun is shining. It’s been warm. The birds are singing. So my worries about drab winter have been put to rest until the next cold front. As a matter of fact, it’s sort of gray today, but I’m acting like it’s still sunny.

The holidays were delightful to say the least. It has been nice having Alli around and seeing all her friends. One night they were all at our house in their PJs acting like little kids once more. Although I didn’t get much sleep that night, I’m glad they were here and had a good time. At about 2:00 am I woke to the smell of something burning.

Never a good thing.

In the kitchen I found Annalee fanning the smoke alarm, Chris fanning smoke out the kitchen window, and Alli fanning the open stove. I must have been scary standing there in my PJs with my angry mother look. Sorry, kids. I was a bit angry, but by the next day I was laughing to myself over that visual of those three kids trying to keep the smoke at bay, and the tray of black, burnt cookies I found sitting on the deck the next morning.

Alli and friends -PJ party at our place (pre-cookie mishap)

Alli told me she has enjoyed her break because she has seen everyone she was hoping to see. It’s been a great season.

Now the clock is ticking again. Alli leaves in a couple of days to go back to school. This will be the long stretch. She will not be home again for 4 months. I know she will be fine. I know I will be fine, but I’m feeling some of the same familiar things I felt back in August when she first flew the coop.

Does she have everything she needs? Have I told her all the things I need to tell her? Have we done everything we need to do before she leaves? Has she forgotten how to do laundry since I have totally spoiled her in that area this month?

The answer to all of the above is that I need to stop worrying like I promised myself I’d do this new year, and remember that mantra (Texas and the Tire Swing 8/22/11) I said I would repeat daily:

Trust your parenting. Trust your parenting. Trust your parenting. Trust your parenting.

Today, while she is out with her friends before they all scatter once more, I have been here preparing my soon to be once more empty nest. My thoughts are gathered like sticks and leaves. I have my first major art project ready to begin. I have my new exercise plan ready to implement. And then there’s spring cleaning…

Life is constantly changing. First we were all together. Alli left for college. Larry was working on an opposite schedule as me. I was into my solitude. Then Alli came home. Then Larry’s long stretch of work is over until spring, and both of them have been home. Now Alli leaves again. Larry will be home a couple of months while I’m home, and then he will be gone again every night. And I will be back to my solitude.

None of these scenarios are bad. There is just always an adjustment.

Here in mid-life, I think I’m doing better with change. I guess I better be!

So, my plan for 2012 is to make some of my own changes, not just try to deal with the things I have no control over.

In honor of David Bowie’s 65th birthday today, here are some appropriate lyrics from Changes (by E. Wilson, C. Reed, S. Ellis, E. Rohen and M. Lorentzen)

I watch the ripples change their size

But never leave the stream

Of warm impermanence

 

Roll with the changes and honor your promises to yourself. Erase what must be erased and start over with a new pencil and paper.

-Libby Lu

 

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5 thoughts on “Hand Me an Eraser, I’m Starting Over

  1. Oh Libby!!! I can’t wait to see what 2012 has to bring us all! Especially your blogs 🙂 Never TMI – this is your Blog & no one elses & if offended only cause you mentioned the word sex, well then my goodness, move on to the next blog! Ha. I appreciate every single 1 of your posts & love laughing & living in your house through your blogs! Love You Libby Lu…

  2. Hey Libby, I know how you feel. I realized yesterday that I’m going to be lonely again when my daughters leaves. We went to the movies and dinner yesterday and it was so nice. I’m so proud of her. I may not miss the multiplying laundry she brings but I will miss the laughter. I’ll fasten my seatbelt and you do the same. We’ll make it through the bumpy ride. Can’t wait for your posts to follow.

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