When I look at this letter to Santa written by 7 year old me, I am rather embarrassed and somewhat fascinated at my phonetic spelling. Sad but true, I still can’t spell, and I still draw on things like a little kid, and the real kicker is that my handwriting was better then than it is now.
Translation: I am asking Santa for a bike with a banana seat, handle bar brakes and butterfly handle bars, a Jane West doll, and a Baby First Step doll.
I had big plans to write a great blog post about Christmas humor, but guess what? I’m running out of time. Funny thing is I’ve “simplified” Christmas this year, so where has the time gone? We did not send out cards. Our family is drawing names for gifts. (We have a rule: Make it, Bake it, or Grow it.) Alli wanted a concert ticket for her gift. Larry and I bought each other a camera last month as our gift to each other. The neighbors and other friends have or will be receiving baked goods. It’s pretty laid back. For Christmas, that is.
Since I have kitchen duty and a few places to be today on this eve of Christmas, I’m going to just post some funny Christmas memories for you here. Please excuse the randomness. I hope they bring you a chuckle…
-Our friends, Nadine and Jim, put a plate of cookies and a note which read, “Merry Christmas, Thurston and Georgianna” in our mutual friend’s mailbox. Before they found it, the mailman came, took the plate of cookies and left a thank you note. Thurston and Georgianna were puzzled, as they had left nothing for the mailman. It took a while, but Nadine finally asked if they had found the cookies, then the mystery was solved.
-Shakespeare was just not keeping the attention of my friend Eddie. Christmas was right around the corner. We were in an English class where I sat near him and Vivian. Eddie loved to pick on Vivian. Not in a mean way, but in a fun loving, pranky kind of way. (I know and share this kind of love very well.) During this particular lecture, Eddie noticed that Vivian had left her purse open and in clear view was a sweet $10.00 bill. While the teacher droned on and on about Bill Shakespeare, Eddie took the opportunity to swipe the money. He kept it until Vivian noticed a couple of days later. He returned it, but said he had plans to buy his mother a Christmas gift and he would have given Vivian credit by signing the tag, “Merry Christmas, From Vivian”
-Until my Dad had his camera ready on Christmas morning, my siblings and I were banned from going in to the living room to see what Santa had left . He didn’t know that the reflection from the tree onto the fridge was like a mirror. We would stand in the kitchen and try to make out the items under the tree. Finally we’d get the word that we could come into the room and we’d run around the corner to our own little personal gathering of gifts. Dad always looked worn out and Mom looked stressed. I understand this now. She had probably been up all night with Daddy, getting our gifts together, and she had hours of cooking ahead. Anyway, one Christmas morning we went into the living room to find a letter from Santa apologizing for breaking the knob off our TV. It ended up being a good thing leading to the purchase of our first color TV.
Thank you, Santa and/or slick thinking, Dad!
-My maternal grandmother, Momma Doye, had so many grandchildren that she would make us our gifts each year. Most years she collected the little plastic containers that margarine came in, and she would make each of us our own little personal container of fudge, complete with silver dragees for decorations. If you don’t know what those are…they are basically silver colored B B’s. Not really, but man they could break teeth. I’m thinking that maybe they were not edible.
One year, in the early ‘70’s, she decided to be a cool grandma and make all of us matching ponchos. After all, that year, ponchos were the in, groovy thing to wear. I wish I had a group photo of all of us in our ponchos. It was like the Partridge Family meets the Poncho Villa Family.
– My father had done some photographic work for an author in California. Evidently she was known for her hand made ornaments, and as a thank you to my Dad, she sent a few of her works to us at Christmas time. I remember the first one he opened. We gathered around as he took what looked like a pimped out miniature UFO out of its wrapping. Dad held it up for all of us to see.
We tried to be nice.
We really did.
Remember that we are a family who loves art and we have a great appreciation for any form of creativity.
Still. It was hard not to laugh.
Well, that ornament has been passed back and forth for years. There have been times when I have been gazing at the tree late at night and been surprised to find it hanging deep within the branches. It’s about time for it to either show up back at my parents, or maybe it’s time for it to show up on one of the younger generation’s tree…
-True confession; my sophomore year of high school, me and my friend Sandra would go off campus with our friend, Vicky for lunch. Vicky’s home was right across the street out the back gate. Her mother was at work during the day. We didn’t do anything bad, except commit an act of truancy. It was nice to just go hang out for half an hour, have lunch and visit away from the crowd in the cafeteria. One day, before the Christmas break, another friend (I shall keep them anonymous.) joined us. He went into where Vicky’s family Christmas tree was and switched all the name tags on the gifts.
I know. It’s mean and cruel. But when I think about what must have been utter confusion on Christmas Day at their house, it makes me laugh.I bet they still talk about that and have no idea whom to pin the blame on.
-One year when Alli was 6 we went to the beach for Christmas. We used up most of our suitcase space to pack the gifts that Santa was bringing. Everything was all planned out and running smoothly for us to keep up the Santa story. Then late Christmas Eve night, Alli asked why Santa never answered her letters, and proceeded to write him a letter and ask for a reply.
As soon as she was asleep, I went to the lobby with a $10.00 bill and asked at the counter who would like to make some easy money by writing a letter for me. Some poor guy with bad handwriting took on the task and saved Christmas for us all. Bad part was, she asked Santa to bring bikes for her parents, and in this letter the desk dude/Santa told her he would. But, he never did!
Larry and I still wait….
-Each year, at historic Mansker’s Station north of Nashville in the town where I grew up, they hold a Yulefest the first weekend of December. Its’ a 1780’s celebration down to the candles, the homemade decorations, the story telling, the A Cappella singing and the oxen drawn cart rides. It became an annual event for me, Alli and her friend Mackenzie to attend, and we did so for a good 10 years.
There is too much to tell you about the adventures we seem to pack in on this 2 hour event each year, but I will tell you why to us, Yulefest is known as Neilfest. The first year we attended and joined in on the folk dancing, there was an adorably handsome boy whom the girls had an immediate attraction to. We found that his name was Neil. Alli and Mackenzie were always hopeful to see him at Yulefest in subsequent years, but after the first 2 years, we never saw our elusive Neil. Still, we had tons of fun at our little annual Christmas outing tradition, which officially became Neilfest to us.
The singing of carols was held in the historic Bowen Campbell House (home to the Leverett-Crew wedding reception of 1984 ♥) It was usually pretty cold, so everyone squeezed into the house, and kept the door closed in the small room. The leaders of the singing were up near the fireplace. The 3 of us always stood in the back to sing. We shared music books. We also share the same warped sense of humor. On some songs we sang out, doing our best harmonies. On some, Mackenzie who has an operatic, soprano voice, belted out her best exagerated vibrato. And on some songs, we all sang off key or flat. We did this with serious faces. We call this “Terrorizing the General Public.” The best part of all was the reaction of the people around us. Most were trying not to laugh. Parents tried to keep their kids from staring. The leaders up front tried to stay on key. It’s some of our best work. Ever.
We knew last year when we attended Neilfest that it would be our last for 4 years, as the girls would be off at college and would not be home when it came around. I really missed it this year, but I’m holding out for December of 2015!
-It’s so hard to always be politically correct, but I do try to be respectful and say Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas this time of year. One of my favorite things to do is when someone wishes me Merry Christmas, and I can tell they are jokable, I reply, “Thanks, but I’m Jewish.”
-A tradition that we began several years ago, is to ride around in our PJ’s and look at the Christmas lights late on Christmas Eve. Sometimes, singing is involved.
No matter what your beliefs, what your background, what you celebrate or don’t celebrate -Keep love in your heart and share it with those around you. Enjoy the peacefulness of this season – The quiet reflection of winter, the birds in the trees, the glow of the sun on ice, the crisp cold air upon your face, and the warmth of friends, neighbors, pets and family.
-Libby Lu and all the Crew